In our post about “Veteran acts to look out for in 2013“, Aussie pop princess Kylie Minogue led the list. Her last studio album “Aphrodite” (released in the summer of 2010) left quite a sweet after-taste for both fans and skeptics. It was by far her most superior album in almost two decades and more than compensated for some her creative misfires in the interceding years between her commercial high with hit singles like “Can’t you get out of my head” and “Love at first sight” and her intensely awesome comeback in 2010. Her follow-up singles “Time Bomb” and “Flower” (the latter being the better song) were not exactly strong enough to reignite the charts anywhere but they achieved the goal of keeping her in the spotlight as she prepared for new album slated to be released this year. The anticipation levels for this album are undoubtedly high – especially after the high benchmark Kylie set with “Aphrodite”.
A few months ago, when we heard that Kylie Minogue had signed with Roc Nation – the artist management company run by Jay-Z, we had some initial concerns. The roster of artists on Roc Nation sound nothing like Kylie Minogue and are not exactly known for their grasp of melody – something Kylie has had quite a knack for since her “Light Years” album (released in 2000). We were afraid that there would be collaborations with Kylie Minogue that would undermine the pop music template that she created and honed over the years quite well. Judging by “Skirt” – the first auditory “glimpse” into the new album, we get the feeling our skepticism was justified. This new song has been co-written by The-Dream and has been produced by Nom De Strip.
The song introduction opens with an electronic beat and quickly switches to Kylie’s highly synthesized vocals which are overlayed over a sparse but utterly tuneless electronic production. The unpleasant and minute-long monotony sounds like the job of an amateur in his basement playing with the special effects of his new keyboard. Only the true Kylie fan would linger around for the chorus – which happens to be the song’s only saving grace. In fact, if digital services such as iTunes and Amazon MP3 use the chorus as the preview for the MP3 download of the track (when it releases), odds are, listeners that don’t know better (and base their purchase decision solely based on the preview) will download the song. Sadly, the chorus ends and the listener is bound to be jolted back into reality, which with regard to this song, is quite awful. The song has no Middle 8.
Rumors indicate that “Skirt” might just be a “buzz” single and not an official lead single. The average listener can barely tell the difference between the two and is highly unlikely to be less forgiving of this song just because it is only a “buzz” single. Kylie Minogue has been in the music business long enough to be able to objectively discern melody from an absolute lack of it. “Skirt” suggests that she might have lost this ability overnight and it does absolutely nothing to increase anticipation for the new album. We sincerely hope this is NOT the beginning of her commercial downfall. All we know is that with the new album, Kylie has to give us something substantial enough to make us forget that “Skirt” ever saw the light of day. For those of you that are curious, here is a full-length clip of the track:
STAR RATING: 1/5 STARS
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